On Your Bike!

By the time I was 45 I was over loud, crowded, sweaty gyms, and stressed and frantic in a corporate job. So I had that age-old excuse of “no time”.  I took a variety of vitamins to maintain and support my health but knew this wouldn’t do the trick on its own. After a couple of years of wallowing and becoming increasingly guilty at my lack of activity, I took up cycling.  How hard could it be? Back in the day I cycled 5km to school and back, not like lazy, computer playing kids of today conveyed to school by car or bus while chowing on takeaways!

My husband, a keen cyclist, was delighted. He swooped in with all kinds of advice, he even bought me a bike. I cunningly bought some Lycra gear so no one would know I was a novice – yeah right. An intense discussion ensued around pedals and bicycle clips. I hadn’t factored in any of this but went along for the proverbial ride. Clips then? Yip.  I omitted to say he is VERY economical with his communication. I had no practice and therefore no understanding of how the clips worked. I was mildly alarmed when I watched him screw the pedal lock things under the cycling shoes and change the pedals into some weird looking metal contraption that the shoes would now clip into. No matter. If he worked them, surely I could.

Early on Saturday morning, I transformed myself into a pseudo-tour de France contender, trussed up in tight fitting Lycra from nobly knees to neck. I complained about the thick padded crotch and was convinced I looked like I was wearing four incontinence pads as I duck-waddled to my bicycle. Helmet – check. Gloves – check. Water bottle – check. Anxious – hell yeah!  With a look from him and a grunt that sounded like “follow me” we took off.

I fumbled and wobbled and after about two blocks managed to get both my shoes into the cleats. That would’ve been reassuring, if I wasn’t so frightened about how to get OUT of them. There was so much to watch out for, trucks, people, dogs, traffic, parked vehicles, and of course my husband. I struggled to keep up with him and then a red traffic light. I slowed and started to wriggle my right foot, trapped in the pedal. I frantically watched the back of him disappear around the corner and slammed on the brakes, falling hard to the right, both shoes still cleated into the racing pedals. Had anyone seen me? NO. This is the reason cyclists go out really early in the morning! I scrambled up, my elbow, knee and thigh bleeding – miraculously through the Lycra, which remained intact.

I leapt back on the bike. I can do this. Frantically ridding in his general direction and now aware of Le technique, was no assurance that I could execute it! Get at least one foot out and ready to hit the road before the traffic lights. Another set of lights and another fall. Sensibly, I fell on the left ,to balance out the grazes and bruising, now on both sides of my body. During that first ride I fell about 5 times and travelled about 30km. The second time I only fell once. I rode most of the time with one foot out of the cleats and balanced precariously on top the metal pedal clip – it inadvertently slipped into position and I fell at the next stop street. I argued for “real” pedals and he insisted I would never learn to ride “properly” and I didn’t. I gave up after several attempts and one race along the coast where I came in the last third of the pack. Some years later he confessed at a dinner party that something was wrong with the cleats themselves that should just slide out easily. Ummmmmmmm.

Now ten years later, I walk, jog and listen to music as I move through the park or along the coast. It’s calm and pleasant, my cycling scars have almost healed – just the psychological ones remain. I did ride again, about a year ago, with real pedals to see if I could get to work each day. In Mission Bay an idiot in a 4WD swung his door out from a parked position, I shouted, swerved to miss being hit head on by his ignorant manouvre and went into the oncoming lane. Fortunately, for me, there was no traffic and I survived – unlike the young woman killed on Tamaki drive two weeks after this. That was the end of my cycling. I will stay firmly on terra firma and enjoy the stress-free ease of moving at my own pace and in my own style.